- Do not put too much cereal in your bowl; otherwise, when you pour the milk, everything overflows. Aim for 2/3 of a bowl.
- When pouring the milk, you really only need enough milk to get everything moist, unless you're a bowl-drinker.
- While you may think you are better served by using a big spoon, smaller spoons are better for avoiding messes.
- Drinking the milk from your bowl is optional.
- Fruity Pebbles, while tasty, are also notoriously fickle, and get really limp really quickly. Don't pour the milk unless you are ready to eat them immediately; potty breaks have to wait until you are done with the bowl. Don't use a lot of milk, as that just makes them soggy more quickly. If you have a few soggy ones left in your bowl, you can improve things by pouring in more Fruity Pebbles. However, your milk is only good for two bowls -- any more than that, and the milk is gross-looking and much too sweet.
- Frosted Flakes also suffer from sogginess. So do all flake cereals (with the exception of Bran Flakes, and maybe Special K). Many of the above rules apply.
- Rice Chex is one of the few cereals that benefit from eating them with a large spoon, due to the size of the Chex. I suggest straining off the excess milk before ingesting.
- Frosted Mini-Wheats have a variety of sub-rules, based on size. If you are eating the regular Mini-Wheats, break the individual biscuits in half before putting them in the bowl -- this helps avoid Splooging Wheat Syndrome (similar to Splooging Chicken Kiev Syndrome). While the Bite Size Mini-Wheats may be an easier size for eating, the frosting tends to clump together, and cuts up the roof of your mouth -- use caution. Straining the Mini-Wheats by pushing your spoon against the edge of the bowl before eating helps maximize the wheat-to-milk ratio.
- Special K is yummy on its own -- you don't need to add sugar. However, Corn Flakes often benefit from a little honey.
- Cheerios are supposed to be eaten with bananas. I, however, hate bananas. Use your own discretion.
- Trader Joe's Gluten-Free Granola tastes best with vanilla yogurt. So does Grape Nuts.
- Honeycomb and Froot Loops are two cereals that actually taste better without any milk. Use milk if you want, but beware the soggy factor.
- There are several reasons to avoid Lucky Charms: 1) the marshmallows don't taste like real marshmallows, and by the time you wait for them to soften up in the milk, the rest of your cereal is soggy; 2) if you have kids, they are just going to eat the marshmallows and leave behind a bowl of uneaten oat pieces; 3) the leprechaun and his tormentors are just annoying.
- Certain cocoa cereals are better than others. Cocoa Krispies are actually pretty good, as are dry Cocoa Puffs. But these are better as an after-school/work snack.
- Kix are sexist -- "mother-approved," my fanny. They aren't bad, but if your parents bought you these and Life as a "healthy" alternative to those sugar cereals (because you were only allowed to eat the healthy stuff), they are a poor substitution. It's like eating Tofurkey and expecting it to taste like real turkey. Respect Kix and Life for what they are (mildly sweet, vaguely cardboard-y, and really gross when soggy), and get your sugar kicks elsewhere.
- Trix has changed shapes a lot. They don't taste like Kix on a bender. Be thankful that they returned to their previous round shape -- the fruit shape was much too sweet and sticky.
- Cap'n Crunch tastes better dry -- it does weird things to your milk. Crunch Berries is vastly superior, but to mitigate the taste of Cap'n Crunch, the preferred ratio of Berries to Cap'n is 2:1 (WARNING: This will leave you with extra Cap'n). Or, better yet, wait for the special Oops All Berries to come out again.
- Don't eat Total. It's boring. Cracklin' Oat Bran is tastier, even if it looks like kibble.
Of course, YMMV. Cereal configurations may change without notice. Maybe they will someday make a Fruity Pebble that stays crispy in milk -- but I doubt it.